No Roots
Yes, my Friends. This, right here, is my first official blog post for my new little site, and I am simply ecstatic about what’s to come! I have held off on actually writing here, because I wasn’t finished with the site’s set up and I don’t even have a logo yet, but I know, by just doing it, all of these things will come! The point is to just start, right? And then the ideas and everything else will follow. That’s usually how it works for me. I rarely have a great idea unless the ball is already rolling. So this is me…rolling that ball. And here it is, my first blog post in it’s raw, unpolished state.
So, here I am. Strong coffee with frothed creamer in hand. I set my alarm and woke up at 4:30am to be here and begin this journey, because I knew it would be a slow start and a rocky beginning. It’s never smooth sailin’ and fun to start anything new, is it? There’s always awkwardness and quite a bit of stumbling that goes along with opening up your computer and writing those first few words. And, of course, at 4:30am, nothing really seems to flow very well.
So, why 4:30am? Most people are somewhat horrified by this hour. What’s the magic behind this time, you ask? Well, you see…I have always been a morning person, but I’ve never been a very disciplined morning person. I used to wake up around this time, and just lie there in bed wondering why I couldn’t sleep. Sometimes, I’d just lie there. Other times, I might get up and scroll through Facebook or Instagram until I got up and around. But most of the time, I was completely unproductive…until I got a job, that is. This job required me to get out of bed at 3:30am so I could be ready and out the door by 4:40am and at work by 5am. As grueling as it sounds, that routine literally transformed my morning routine. Sure, I cried all the way to work my first 2-3 weeks at that job. But after the initial shock and horror of getting up wore off, I was fine. And the truth is, I actually enjoyed it and felt a little superior to already be up and at ’em while the rest of the world was still hitting their snooze buttons. And so…even after leaving that job, I still love waking up early. It gives me that slight edge and helps me set the tone for my day before all the distractions and noise start to creep in. Glad we cleared that up! 🙂
This past week was our Spring Break. We started off the week with sickness that made rounds to everyone in our family except for me and my daughter, but we ended up having one of the best weeks of our family’s life. It was simply divine. We watched movies. We played outside. We went camping for a night at Lake Whitney State Park. We went to the Silos in Waco on our way back home. We attended a worship service at The Church on South Congress on Sunday morning and had amazing ice cream at a food trailer called Manoli’s. When we got back home, we went down and introduced ourselves to our new neighbors — a young couple who were painting their kitchen cabinets in their garage. We instantly exchanged phone numbers and ended up texting back and forth all evening. If anything, this week taught me that 1. Staying home is great, but… 2. Getting out of the house is amazing. 3. My family can adjust to anything and have fun. 4. Being home too much means too much technology. 5. Exploring and being out and about is for sure what makes us most happy. But we need a budget for that! ha.
Seriously, though…I am a homebody by nature. My tendency is to avoid leaving the house at all costs. There’s always just too much to do at home. Too many things to be cleaned, organized, repaired, cleaned, folded, put away, prepared. I never seem to actually feel the FREEDOM to leave my home. Does this resonate with anyone out there? We feel like we can’t go anywhere until all is done and we are free and clear in our minds? But the problem I’ve learned is that we’re never fully free and clear. We never feel like all is done at home. There will always be laundry piled up. There will always be an uninspiring pile of dishes in the sink. There will always be messes lying around. And sometimes ya just have to leave it all and get out of the house for a few hours. That was me today.
And in our family, here’s what happens when we pile into our dirty, old, but very reliable 2004 Toyota Sienna: The weight of the world immediately lifts off of us. Our task lists melt away. Our technology stays at home. We start talking. We start laughing. We start singing. Our moods lighten. We are mesmerized by adventure and exploration. And we have such a great time together. And here’s the thing: We’re ALL craving it. We need it like a plant needs water. Adventure is in our blood.
My husband and I shouldn’t be surprised by this. After all, we have always loved to explore and try new things. That’s what drew us together in the first place. Our very first date was going to a brunch place in Vienna called “High Tea”. In order to go there, and have a beautiful table to brunch on with comfy high back chairs to sit in, you had to reserve the spot weeks in advance. So that’s what Thomas did. I had never heard about it before, but true to fashion, my then “new friend” now husband had read about it and wanted to check it out. He is still the same now, by the way. Always looking for new places to “go check out.” That’ what I adored about him then and it’s what I adore about him now. He always wants to try new things and do new things. It’s in his blood.
Thomas, my husband, is from Vienna, Austria. But he also spent the first 10 years of his life in Stuttgart, Germany. His Mom and Aunt, twin sisters who were given up for adoption as young babies and adopted by a sweet couple in Thallern, are from a region known as Niederoesterreich (Lower Austria) along the Danube where they have no shortage of vineyards and fruit trees. Thomas’s father is from the German-speaking part of Czechoslovakia and he fled with his mother and grandmother after the war to Austria. Thomas was the only child to parents who knew no real place called “home”. And like his parents, Thomas never really felt at home where he lived. When he was in Germany, he was considered to be the Austrian, and when he and his family moved back to Austria, he spoke and acted like a German.
I, on the other hand, am from Lee’s Summit, Missouri just on the outskirts of Kansas City. I grew up there all my life, but never really felt like it was my home home. Does that make sense? My parents would laugh and say that I was adopted or switched at birth, because I always longed for something different and I never really fit in with our family or with the people we knew. I always longed for close friendships, but they always seemed out of reach for me. I always longed for people to connect with, but my best attempts at connecting felt contrived and forced. That’s when I realized I needed an outlet. My outlet was playing the piano and singing. Both of my parents grew up just miles away from our family home and their parents had also grown up close by. Never in my life did I know about foreign lands or have the desire to explore them. I just knew I loved music. And music led me to meet new people, try new things, go to college, travel the world and end up in Vienna, Austria.
So, why then…why am I tied to a house in Austin, TX with an endless supply of tasks that keep me weighed down when there is a world out there that we want to see and explore? Why are we trying to “keep up with the Jones’s” by constantly taking care of a house that we do love, but one that also keeps us from really living the life we want to live?
I’m actually really trying to navigate this in my life. My goal this year, in 2018, is to find a way for us to live simply at home so that we can be more mobile and do more. I don’t want to have a million things I need to do at home. I want to spend time with my family exploring the world around us. I want to go places, meet people, eat different foods, have experiences that enrich our lives. I don’t necessarily want to be tied to a home with a huge yard and tons of responsibilities. Part of me thinks we need this and the kids need the stability of a home and a community. And I agree that all of that is really important, too. But the other part of me just wants to explore the world with my family and wake up in a new place from time to time. But where’s the happy medium? How do we find this balance we so desperately long for in our lives? No wonder the song, “No Roots” is a huge hit in our household. We really don’t feel anchored to anyone or anything except for the Lord. In essence, we have that gypsy spirit that feels bogged down when we get too committed or feel like we have been somewhere for too long.
So, that, my friends, is where I am this morning. Thinking outloud about how to navigate this world and raise our children responsibly but still show them what the world has to offer.
As I type this, there are news stories of bombs being left in packages on people’s doorsteps all over Austin. Nowhere is safe. In the news, you hear of school shootings in schools where you’d never suspect a demented teen was plotting against his classmates. Nowhere is safe. So, why then, are we trying to live safe lives in our own little safe communities and not really living and going and doing things we’ve always wanted to do? I’m done playing safe. I’m done not living out in the world because there are dangerous people. I’m ready for something new. Something fresh. Something good. Something beyond my imagination.
No roots, Baby…let’s do this!
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