Oh how I’ve missed blogging. Like singing, it is my lifeline! And yet, time and energy has evaded me over the past few months, and it has fallen, among many other passions down the list of priorities and things to do. But, with a new baby on the way, and so many things going on in our lives, I am determined to fight through the sleep deprivation and do this — even if it’s just a grammatically poor one-liner that says how things are going!
So, here’s the deal…I woke up this morning, on Thanksgiving Day, feeling surprisingly content and rested and just happy to be alive. I don’t know why that doesn’t happen every day, and I really don’t know why I haven’t noticed feeling this much contentment in the past, but right now I am swimming in it. And I believe I know why.
Over the course of the past few months, I’ve been literally inhaling a book I just happened upon called “One Thousand Gifts”. I hadn’t heard anything about the author before, but I took a risk and downloaded it on my kindle. Since then, I have absorbed every word and gulped it down like a chocolate mocha with whipped cream after a 30-day sugar fast. I can honestly say that I have loved every minute of this book, and when it was over, I was so sad because I wanted more of it. This book has taught me things that I knew to be true deep down, but it made the truth a reality to me that I could grasp and act upon. Thank ya, Jesus!
The main thing I have gathered from it is learning how to be grateful and content…or how to practice Eucharisteo, as she puts it. Eucharisteo is a term that is literally the act of gratitude for what you have and how that act alone can open up God’s hands and help us to experience Him and know Him more and, in essence, change our lives. However, contrary to what I have been living and experiencing throughout my life, contentment is not a feeling, but an expression of obedience. In other words, I don’t have to feel contentment in order to practice gratitude. Quite the contrary. I choose to be grateful and that self-inflicted gratitude begats more gratitude, and before long, I am present, and in the moment, and I am oh so content.
I wish this was a philosophy of life that was shared more often. Every November, we are prompted to be grateful as we approach Thanksgiving, but I fear that few of us (including myself) ever know what that truly means. Like everything else, being grateful has become trite and trendy. You see posts on Facebook about things people are grateful for, and I don’t mean to knock that down, because I love reading them. However, I now believe true gratitude is much more than just counting all of the things we’re grateful for during one month out of the year. Gratitude…true gratitude, that is…encompasses our very being throughout every day of the year and changes how we act, think and feel at any given moment. It changes our lives. It changes our outlook. It changes our relationships. In other words, as great as it is to actually have things to be grateful for, the Bible says in Philippians 4:11, “Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content.” It’s not about what we have. It’s about our attitude about what we have.
Whew! Now that’s a game-changer.
So, here I am, sitting here in the dark at 6:30am in my living room. My parents just arrived last night from Kansas City to celebrate Thanksgiving with us. I have 5 weeks to go before I meet my precious little baby girl. Everyone is sleeping but me and the dog. And I am content…oh so content. And I like me this way. Not only that, but I want to capture this feeling and keep it in a jar and take it out everyday — especially on those days when I am more prone to living the opposite. I don’t want to be the way I’ve been anymore. Discontentment brings about true and utter ugliness for me. And here are some things I am learning to let go of (even if painfully slow):
- Being grouchy and irritable. Because grouchiness is a form of discontentment. Something isn’t quite right, and everyone’s gonna know about it.
- Being a perfectionist. Because perfectionism is a form of discontentment. It means there’s always something that could be done better.
- Being a complainer. Because complaining is a form of discontentment. If I complain, I’m not content.
- Being critical. Because criticism is a form of discontentment. If I criticize, I miss out on contentment.
- Being envious. Because envy is a form of discontentment. If I envy, I am not happy with what God has given me.
You get the picture. These ideas seem obvious, but they weren’t for me. I knew, before reading this book, that I wanted to change, but I didn’t know what it required of me. I didn’t know it was right within my grasp. Now I do. And I thank God I do.
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